Friday, February 18, 2005

If it ain't BOKEN---DON'T FIX IT.

Hello all, Chelsea here. Fellow blogger Adam Wade lives in Hoboken. He refers to the area constantly as "Boken". What follows is our IM pun session:

CHELSEA: heartboken
WADE: stuck stroken in boken
that's not a pun though
CHELSEA: absolutely not
WADE: sorry
CHELSEA: Boken Hearts Club Band
CHELSEA: Subway doesn't take bokens anymore
CHELSEA: I love boken word poetry!
CHELSEA: My car was boken down by the side of the rode!
WADE: pants are boken wet
CHELSEA: boken like a true wordsmith!
CHELSEA: boKen and Barbie
WADE: i eat boken-bits with my salads
CHELSEA: isn't it funny that we've never boken on the phone?
CHELSEA: i was running so fast, man--i was boken!
CHELSEA: A good story has a strong bokenning and end
CHELSEA: to keep my books from flopping over i use bokens

[Deleted WADE anecdote about Dad]

CHELSEA: let's not get offtopic
there's sort of an unboken rule
when you're in a pun session
CHELSEA: boken out of prison
boken fingernail
were you boken up by the phone ringing?
me and my bf are now boken up
boken dreams
WADE: the truth is seldom boken
WADE: boken english
CHELSEA: i tried to publish a post on my blog, but the html code was boken
WADE: I called him as ass, now I got a boken nose
CHELSEA: quit boken around in my things!
CHELSEA: i wasn't talking to you to boken with!
WADE: you've boken my lamp, now i want money for it
CHELSEA: you're boken up the wrong tree!
WADE: my parents vacation in boken raton
CHELSEA: how to save a boken victim
CHELSEA: let the games boken!

[From Chelsea and Adam Wade.]

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Happiness is a Warm Pun

The following is from an email forward Michelle got!

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It.

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.

9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko..

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?

13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.

22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer